Written by Xavier Fairbanks

Monday, 3 August 2015


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image for Browntown - Xavier Fairbanks intimate Interview with Chris Brown

This week, Writer, Xavier Fairbanks, had the opportunity to sit down with Chris Brown and Train to discuss their song Bruises, and the meaning behind the lyrics. Here are a few of our favorite Q&A's from the interview.

Q: Chris, what made you seek out Train to work on this song together?

A: Well, after I had my troubles with Rihanna, man, I mean I had to do something. It was just bad PR for me, you know what I'm sayin? Had to make more of the Benjamins.

Q:So can you tell me a little more about the whole Rhianna incident? I mean we all know what the news outlets say, but what really happened?

A: Xavier, you wanna know the real truth? She a kinky ass hoe! You heard her song! Chains and whips, they excite that bitch. She come at me all like, "Oh Chris, I wanna be your bitch! Make me your bitch Chris!" so I went old school 50's style! I yelled at her for gettin her ass out the kitchen, and I popped the bitch right in the face. She was all happy and shit and begged for more.

Q: Wow, who would have guessed? So why did she go to the media after all this? I mean if she wanted it, what's all the fuss?

A: Well, Xavier, nobody likes to see a woman beat up, ok? I mean shit, the bitch be trippin. It's like I said before, and I'll say it again, bitch was askin for it!

Q:So in the song, the lyrics say,
"These bruises make for better conversation
Loses the vibe that separates,
It's good to let you in again
You're not alone in how you've been
Everybody loses
We all got bruises
We all got bruises"

What is the meaning behind this?

A: What a stupid ass question. What it means is if you you ask me to hit you and I hit you, willingly participating in your fantasy, then bitch stop trippin! It's like the next part,
"I would love to fix it all for you
I would love to fix you too
Please don't fix a thing whatever you do"

I'm saying, hey if you went too fast, man whatever, I'll fix it. Then there she goes with her crazy ass, "nah beat my ass again Chris! Please beat my ass again!"

Q: So why did you do it though, I mean knowing what a public figure you are, wouldn't you think the shit was gonna hit the fan sometime?

A: The shit did hit the fan, Xavier. Just two night before that I woke up to her lighting my pubes on fire and singing the opening song from Lion King in an African headdress! Wouldn't you knock her the fuck into tomorrow too?

Join us next week when we sit down to interview the ghost of Joan Rivers after her latest plastic surgery procedure!

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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