Answer Yes or No
1) Have you ever woken up in bed with a blood covered machete beside you?
2) Are you serving consecutive or concurrent life sentences for murder?
3) Do you hate your mother?
4) Have you ever tortured animals? ( excluding officially approved laboratory trials).
5) Do you think all women are painted harlots and instruments of the devil?
6) Do you frequently hide in bushes around University female accommodation blocks?
7) Was your father weak and dominated by all the family including your dog?
8) If your mother is dead, have you dug up her body and placed it in a rocking chair in her old room?
9) Do you hear voices telling you to kill and mutilate people?
10) Is there just one version of you in your mind, or do you share it with a head full of crazy personalities?
If you have answered yes to 4 or more of the above questions then you have the right qualifications for the position of serial killer and could start right away.
