Auntie Jean Advises Ben O. Verbitch Regarding His Amazing Genitals

Funny story written by Auntie Jean

Thursday, 19 June 2014

image for Auntie Jean Advises Ben O. Verbitch Regarding His Amazing Genitals

Ben O. Verbitch asks: Auntie Jean, After having won second prize in a hamper competition consisting of 100kg of radioactive canned spinach, I rubbed some of it on my testicles and now I have the wedding tackle of an elephant.

Auntie Jean Advises : This is terrible. See a surgeon and then try to dump the radioactive spinach in several public litter bins. Failing that put it on your garden gnomes to make lichen patina ageing happen - typically about a month to wait and you won't need solar lights any more as the whole garden will be visible from the Fucking International Space Station.

Take it to a vegan restaurant and accept any cash for it. Post it to Paul McCartney but with a "Do not smoke" notice on it. If all else fails try to get rid of it in a Sushi Restaurant fish tank - they will think it is fish dirt and clean it out. You should really. call the Police and Fire Brigade before doing any of this though. I hope things work out O.K. for you, Ben.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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