The Writing On The Wall

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Wednesday, 14 December 2016

image for The Writing On The Wall
Afore the writing was writted

I'm the cat amongst your pigeons
I'm the writing on your wall
I'm the black sheep in your family
No, I don't fit in at all

I'm the sight that raises eyebrows
The cause of nervous coughs
The fly in soup and ointment
The cap that's never doffed

It's me! The spanner in the works
The dust speck in your eye
When everything seems out of sync
You know that I'm nearby

I'm the scalpel left inside you
I'm the spark that starts the blaze
The pan that's boiling over
The weevil in the maize

At school, I was your 'algebra'
The one you couldn't get
Unfathomable, impossible
A room that can't be let

I'm the hair that's in your dinner
I'm the inkstain on your shirt
The loudmouth on the last bus home
Whose voice is stuck on 'blurt'

I'm the bee that's in your bathroom
The know-it-all who rants
The wasp that likes your hairspray
I'm the ant that's in your pants

Trickster, robber, swindler
Grifter, oddball, freak
Waster, loafer, layabout
Liar, weirdo, cheat

I'm the fish that's out of water
Square peg in round hole
The guy who 'kissed' your daughter
Tho' she's only 15 years old!


Woods 2016

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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