Written by Dirty Milk

Sunday, 31 July 2011

Once upon a time there was a big bully called Tom Flashman who attended Grove Park public school.

He picked on boys for nothing.

One boy, Sidney saucepan, got nabbed by the scruff of his neck and dragged along the corridor.

Flashman then beat him up.

"You lump of meat, shouted Flashman, I'll chuck you out of the window."

The big then ran off.

Sidney Saucepan saw stars.

Soon afterwards the boy went to the headmaster's office.

"Who beat you up said Mr. Torch, the headmaster.

"I don't know said Sidney Saucepan.

"I'll soon find the bully said the headmaster."

So Mr. Torch went bullyhunting to find the bully who beat up Sidney Saucepan.

All of a sudden Ian Breadbasket the right hand man of flashman crashed in throught the window of Dormitory no 2.

Ian grabbed hold of a bed and punched a hole in it, then he threw the bed up to the ceiling.

Next, the bully's mate stabbed another bed.

The bed let out a yell.

In walked Flashman.

He and his mate ian Breadbasket beat up Dormitory no 2.

Suddenly, ni walked the headmaster's office.

"Get out Headmaster's office shouted the bullies."

But the headmaster's office took no notice.

All of a sudden a sausage burst into dormitory no 2, grabbed hold of Flashamn and ian Breadbasket and slung them out of the window, but the bullies flew back in again and beat up the sausage.

"Now sausage Face, get out of this dormitory."

In the end the headmaster walked in and said:

"You two, you've had it this time, look what you've done to Dormitory no 2, you will pay for this."

So, the headmaster put the bullies in his mouth and took them down to his office.

They got the cane.

Tom Flashman was king of the bullies.

He once dumped a new boy into the mincing machine. The headmaster saw that he was so badly minced that he took the boy to a factory to be repaired.

A lot of boys got bullied by Flashman and his gang.

Once a boy called Pete Prison had his feet stolen so he had to walk on his head.

One day the headmaster caught Flashman and his gang dumping a boy in the dustbin.

The bullies were caught and expelled.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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