Lady Gaga running for President of United States in 2012

Funny story written by Bobby Fontaine

Saturday, 26 February 2011

The hush hush release of Lady Gaga's 'Born This Way' on Friday, February 11, 2011 was the same day it was being reported that the due date for babies conceived that day would be 11/11/11. Those were the two sensational stories of the day. A lot of articles even talked about them both but none drew a connection.

Ever since the release of Born This Way, the Lady Gaga talk has been about it being a Madonna knock off of 'Express Yourself''. Then it turned out that Madonna doesn't mind Gaga expressing her version of the song, in fact she says she's Lady Gaga's biggest fan.

It didn't end there, Gaga sang Born This Way at the Grammy's on Sunday night. She arrived at the event concealed in an egg that she exited singing her new single publicly for the first time. Now it turns out she'd been in the egg for 3 days by the time she sang at the Grammy's. This means she went into the egg on Friday the 11th, the day needed to conceived a baby to be born on 11/11/11. Actually she said she had been in the egg 72 hours, which means she entered the egg Thursday night if she was in L.A. where the Grammy's were held. It was however already Friday throughout most of the world by the time she entered the egg Thursday night, unless she happened to be somewhere it was already Friday. I'm thinking she entered the egg at the exact time the song was released in whatever part of the world it was first released in on Friday when it was still Thursday here.

What I'm saying is that it's pretty obvious she's trying to create a stir about something big she's secretly planning to do on 11/11/11 and wants her fans and the media to speculate about it until then. There's the date she released the song, the title of the song, the egg, and the fact that she spent three days in the egg leading up too her giving birth to it publicly for the first time as evidence she's up to something mysterious. This appears to be part of a grandiose marketing scheme, something other public relations campaigns won't be trying to take advantage of until the weeks and months leading up to 11/11/11. Even though it's pretty obvious this is what she's up to, no one seems to have picked up on it yet.

If you're still with me, think about this, 11/11/11, or November 11, 2011, is about the perfect time kick off a candidacy for President of the United States. Actually it's a reasonable time but they start gathering support and raising money much earlier. For someone with a guaranteed voting block and money to burn, November 2011 is a good time to enter the fray with the rest of the candidates.

Not too far back there were stories about Gaga having more facebook friends than Obama. Then there was an outcry from her fans suggesting she should run for President. Shortly after that, she spoke out against Arizona's discriminatory immigration laws saying she wanted her fans to "take a stand against any laws that make you feel like you don't belong". She talked to her audience with rehearsed passion the same way politicians do. She further inspired then to take to the streets saying "we have to be active, we have to actively protest, and the nature of the Monster Ball is to actively protest prejudice and injustice and this BS that is put on our society and you, because you are a superstar, no matter who you are, or where you come from, you were BORN THAT WAY."

Then she stood motionless for a few moments holding her right hand that was gloved with a monster style hand out towards the audience saying "don't be afraid because if it wasn't for you, this country wouldn't have sh!t." She completed the rant parading around the stage holding up a staff with a lantern on top of it symbolic of the Statue of Liberty's torch, then launched into a song after a brief comment about gay pride. That was on July 31 of last year when the politics of the 2010-election cycle was just steaming up.

If I was Lady Gaga, I would want to insure I went down in history as more than a pop star, Madonna has already been there and done that. So Gaga has to go bigger. Since there's no presidency of the planet earth, she has to settle for the next best thing, and she wouldn't have to be planning on winning to make the history books, just get in the game and make enough noise to never be forgotten.

Gay marriage is a presidential issue that no one has had the guts to stand up proudly enough for to make it a reality. Born This Way doesn't just address the gays but anyone who is made to feel like an outside in mainstream society, which actually is most people by one standard or another. If running for president is what Gaga is up to, she could actually be a threat to the status quo. She has the popularity, money, and a message that could resonate with a lot of people.

Less than half of Americans vote in presidential elections so there is always room for an upset. The only real problem with her campaign is that no one has picked up on there being one yet. Since she would obviously be going to keep silent about it until the big reveal on 11/11/11, this article is in a way perhaps an informal launch of her campaign.

2012 is gonna be one heck of a crazy year, ain't a doubt in my mind.

I'll end by saying "Vote for Lady Gaga in 2012".

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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