The real lyrics of the French national anthem released today

Funny story written by matwil

Thursday, 17 December 2009

image for The real lyrics of the French national anthem released today
Do we surrender now, or after 10 million Russians have died fighting the Nazis?

Here are the original lyrics to the national anthem of France, 'La Mayonnaise':

'Come children surrender to the Fatherland
The day of glory's yet to come
Collaborating with the Nazis
Losing to England once again

Do you hear all round the countryside
The sound of the brave Maqis?
Ten brave Frenchmen and their dog
What a feeble country!

Surrender, while the Brits fight!
Drink wine, while London burns!
As bad as American cowardaises
Watching British and Germans die

Not a bomb fell on Paris in World War Two
While whole cities were destroyed in England
Vichy France was a fascist state
The French are a sad joke

Down arms, citizens!
Let the British fight our wars!
And Canadians and Ozzies too
Yanks and Frogs are yellow, ew!

(These lyrics are being released as part of the British and German and Russian campaign to point out that two World Wars were fought and won or lost by the people of Britain and its Commonwealth, Germany and Russia.

French and Americans are correctly seen by the British as cowards, but at least they know how to make films showing them winning wars they bravely avoided. You can only fool all of the French and American people some of the time - the British have no need for a national anthem, they invented the modern world.

What have the French ever done? Nope, beats me too ... The British even got rid of Napoleon Bonaparte for the French, so let us know if you need another World War won for you. V'a-t'en, espece des cochons nazis, many of my family died fighting the Nazis for 6 years while French women romanced SS officers across France. The French are cowardly, collaborating shites that deserve their German neighbours.

Even American cowards never actively collaborated with Adolf Hitler. If I was married to a French woman I'd watch my back very carefully. Well, how can you trust women that shag Nazis - Nazis! - for a few loaves of bread and some cheese? Lucky the English have more sense than that.

Oops ... )

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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