Political Measurement Units List Released

Funny story written by Philbert of Macadamia

Thursday, 1 October 2009

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Secaucus NJ: The Hoboken Institute of Standards Technology (HIST) has released the latest political and pop culture measurement units. HIST updates this list every 10 years to keep up with the happenings in Washington DC and Hollywood.

For those readers not familiar with such a list here is an example; 1 Hitler is the absolute measurement of evil in the world, thus a number of milli or micro Hitler's might be used to describe Saddam Hussein, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad or your Mother-in-Law. The latest additions to the list are:

1 Obama: A measurement of magic, especially relating to economic endeavors such as government spending, taxing the rich to cover everything and defining hidden middle class tax increases.

1 Biden: A measurement of foot-in-mouth incidents, sometimes called the Pelosi.

1 Gore: A measurement of do as I say not as I do.

1 Bush: A measurement of garbling the English language.

1 Gibbs: Previously called the Pinocchio.

1 Frank: A measurement of the destruction of the US mortgage lending program.

1 Dodd:
A measurement of the destruction of the US banking system.

1 Fannie Mae/Freddie Mac:
See 1 Frank.

1 Congress: A measurement of excessive government spending and pork.

1 Britney: A measurement of the unintentional display of female body parts to the Paparazzi. Janet Jackson rates as 1 pica Britney. Replaces the Madonna!

HIST invites preparation of a similar list for UK politicians and celebrities.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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