Written by Rusty

Thursday, 4 September 2008


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image for McKinnon Marked Man for Hacking Real X-Files
Dubya logs on : Do I type Shit or Shinola?

A demonstration on behalf of Gary McKinnon was held outside the Home Office in London yesterday afternoon with protesters hurling cobs of fermenting chocolate blancmange and lumps of steaming aardvark shite at Home Secretary Jacqui Smith when she appeared on her third floor office balcony, ordering the assembly to "Be quiet and fuck off".

Ms. Smith quickly retreated inside when her hi-viz tartan stab jacket was splattered with the viscous projectiles.

For those living in caves or just returning from an extended vacation with Hermit Holidays, here's the low-down on Gary McKinnon and the imminent death of Habeas Corpus in the UK.

A 42-year old Scottish computer hacker with the online sobriquet "Solo", Gary stands accused by the US government of perpetrating the "biggest military computer hack of all time" when he accessed US Intelligence agencies' computers in search of their real X-Files.

In reality, all he did was to shown up and embarrass the US Military Intelligence (sic) agencies, exposing them as the bunch of inept amateurs they really are, with their much vaunted computer security systems having more holes than an Irish colander.

He claims his motivation for the hacking incidents originated from a faux pas statement made at the Washington Press Club in May 2001 involving the top secret "Disclosure Project". He hoped to find evidence of UFO's, antigravity technology, faked Moon landings, the US military-industrial complex's suppression of "Free Energy" and their multiple HAARP array induced earthquake and tsunami attacks on the nations of Greater Asia : all of which he claims to have proven through his actions.

In an interview with the BBC he also claimed that "The Disclosure Project" states a captured spacecraft, extra-terrestrial in origin, was reverse engineered by US military scientists and General Motors.

Gary, a computer systems administrator, is accused of hacking into 97 United States military and NASA computers in 2001 and 2002. The computer networks he is accused of hacking include networks owned by NASA, Wal-Mart, the US Army, Sesame Street, the US Navy, Department of Defense, Kentucky Fried Iraqis, the US-Israel False Flag Op's Dept., and the US Air Force.

Gary was originally tracked down and arrested under the Computer Misuse Act by the UK's premium Crime Unit for National hi-Tech Services (CUNTS) in 2002 who informed him that he would face community service and probably have to clean all the windows around Glasgow. However, the Crown Prosecution Service refused to charge him.
Later that year he was targeted and indicted by the United States government's Extreme Revenge Department.

Now the morally bankrupt United States want to extradite Gary, who has recently been diagnosed with Aspergers Syndrome, to face a possible seventy year prison sentence in Guantanamo Bay or another of their numerous top security sodomite paradises, and have even threatened him with "being fried" as they state his trial will be held in Virginia where the Death penalty is still in force. Nasty, eh.

Since when do we extradite our citizens for computer misuse, a misdemeanour which still carries a slap-on-the-wrist or community service order here in the UK.

The UK cannot extradite US citizens without cast iron proof but the US can now take any UK citizen on the strength of an allegation alone.

Que? Something stinks in Denmark, and it isn't Hamlet's socks.

When a purported First World (civilized?) nation okays and allows such practices of extreme rendition (read Torture) as water boarding, McDonald's Supersize Me meals, the broadcast of George Dubya's speeches, the Monkey Scrub and the dreaded Chinese Burn as necessary under their false flag fiasco of fighting terrorism, then we're all fucked with a large capital F.

Gary McKinnon made the US military / intelligence computer system and its operatives look stupid by gaining access in search of covered-up information about UFO activity.

Now the spooks and goons want their own back. It's nothing to do with 'security' and everything to do with John Wayne's mortally bruised ego.

Who can forget their eternal resentment with the Canadians for having the best view of the Niagara Falls.

Why can't our Colonial cocksuckin' Cousins put it down to experience, say "Cheers" to Gary for pointing out their inherent security loopholes, rub some other unguent on their affronted self-esteem and leave the balm of spiteful vengeance justly corked in its wickedly dark bottle.

However, human nature being what it is, and as the British government wags its body in tune to the US establishment's vindictive tail, they'll do whatever they're told. It's called the 'Free World', apparently.

For fuck's sake, beam me up, Scully.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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