Rabbi Lionel Blue speaks

Written by Steddyeddy

Thursday, 21 August 2008

image for Rabbi Lionel Blue speaks
Father Lionel Blue as we couldn't find a picture of Rabbi Lionel Blue

Hello John, Hello Sue, Hello Billy, Hello Bobby, Hello Readers.

I was watching the Olympic Games last night and realised that there are three medal positions. I thought to myself, this must be because they are unsure who the winner of an Olympic Game is, so they give three out just, as the Irish would say, to be sure, to be sure, to be sure.

The Olympic Games are really great for sport. They are not so good for say fish and chips, but they are great for sport.

My friend Solly Schmuck is a runner. That is how he keeps fit. He runs 7 miles a day, and by the end of the week he's 49 miles away from his nagging wife Marcia, may God bless her.

Now his wife Marcia is a lovely woman, a little on the large side, but then this does help her with her job at Heathrow Airport kick-starting the RyanAir jets. She makes lovely secondary vegetarian chicken soup - it's secondary vegetarian because the chickens she uses don't eat meat.

I have a new job at Waterstones today recommending good books for the customers to buy. I recommended this terrific book by a chap called Rabbi Lionel Blue, itself called "Blue for You", which I believe is also the title of a record by that wonderful pop group Status Quid. Their sweet Caroline is no relation to Neil Diamond's, I am lead to believe.

Well, the American elections are in full swing. I am glad John McCain hasn't got a chip on his shoulder, because Mr Obama would be bound to accuse him of advertising.

I want to meet Mr Obama. He was on holiday in Hawaii, and I want to quiz him about the best hotels to stay at, because I'm taking Mrs Blue there for her birthday. Sadly, I wont be bringing her back, but that's show business.

Thank you for reading.

Goodbye Sue, Goodbye John, Goodbye Billy, Goodbye Bobby, Goodbye readers.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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