Grease VS. Grease 2

Funny story written by Coco Parker-Wilt

Monday, 19 November 2007


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I know that in today's world that this entire subject is absurd, unimportant, and just plain stupid, but this a debate that must be faced!

This is the subject of importance when it comes to taste, talent, and tact and frankly I feel that it is high time and long overdue.

Grease VS. Grease 2? Which do you prefer? Now let's be real here, we all know that the first movie was the best! Growing up we all knew the words to every song (you all sang and danced to it and you know it) and the bland acting of Olivia was painful at times, but enjoyable none the less. It was full of sexual innuendoes and we heard the word tit in a song! Funny, I look at it now and I cannot believe my parents ever aloud me to watch it, but it was a great flick.

Oh how I longed to be a Pink Lady...with the jacket and the pink car. Rizzo the sleeze, Sandy when she appears as a slut in order to win the man that she loves. (What message are we sending?) Danny, the hair and the attitude, not to mention the great a**. And my personal favourite, Kenicki, what a clone and a want to be, but I love that about him. Then there is Cha Cha, the freakish chesty 40 year old that had some sordid love affair with Danny at one point that he so very clearly did not want to admit to. And the ugliest woman alive with exception to Shelly Duvall, Frenchy! We all love Frenchy! Even as a beauty school drop out, she was great! It's filled with great songs, dance, and all out 50's fun! Although a bit tongue and cheek it's always a joy to watch.

Now Grease 2..where do I start with this cheesy piece of s***? Okay, well it must be said that Michelle was young, looking for work and was only hired because of her beauty, not acting, singing, dancing, walking, or chewing gum ability for that matter. Lorenzo Lamas? Could that part had been any more miscast? First off not one person in the entire 90 minutes can carry a tune. The lyrics were so horrible, I am sure that my 8 year old could write better lyrics. "I want a coo coo cooool rider" there are a lot of "woo woo woos" and "oh oh ohs" due to the fact that whatever masochist that wrote this s*** had no idea how to write an intelligent sentence.

The Pink Ladies jackets were much cooler, I will give you that, but frankly, the Ladies seemed a bit weak in this one and they are to rule the school. Frenchy is in the second one, oddly taking chemistry in a high school when she is clearly in her 30's, perhaps Frankie needs to give her another boost? This mystery rider suddenly buys a bike with money he makes from writing papers for the T Birds. It's funny, when they are paying him off, each are giving him like three dollars, and somehow he buys a bike. He then becomes a cycle master in a few weeks and wins Stephanie's heart. The only remotely amusing part of this horrid nightmare, is also the worst part of it, that is where the beauty lies. It's the "Reproduction" number in the classroom. This is an awful display and I have to secretly tell you that I love it. I'm not sure as to why, but I am sure it has a little to do with the fact that the differences between boys and girls and the way they think about sex. I find it so funny now to watch how careful we were then. Now on TV you hear s***, a**, I have even heard (believe it or not) c***! But they so carefully step around it in this number that it is pure entertainment to watch the actors trying not stop rolling and say to the director, "What the f*** are we doing here?"

I guess the point is, if you are going to watch a Grease flick, pick carefully. Choose to have taste. Go with the original, just like and Elvis impersonator, you know it isn't the real thing.
Forgive this blog, it isn't my best work. I have a political one in the works that should ruffle a few feathers, so look forward to that. Until then...goodnight Gracie...

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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