The Former Mrs. Tiger Woods, Elin Nordegren Seen Sensuously Snuggling Up A Storm With A Swedish Billionaire

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Friday, 15 July 2011


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STOCKHOLM, Sweden - Elin Nordegren has long since forgotten about old Tiger what's-his-name. She has not heard the words Cadillac Escalade, GolfGate, or WeenieBoy mentioned in a long time.

Since leaving the man who became known throughout the nation as "Dick With Feet" Woods, and moving to Sweden with her two children and half of WeenieBoy's money ($342 million) Nordegren has been doing very well for herself.

She has appeared in magazine advertisements for everything from sandals and thigh high stockings to bikini swimsuits and Brazilian Wax Jobs.

Nordegren who is 31, says that since leaving America and returning back to her native Sweden she has unofficially dated about 218 different men including Reinhold Hasselholm the famous sardine exporter, Stig Karlskrona the famous ice sculptor of nude females, and Valter Nackatuna the not-so-famous but rich reindeer breeder.

Of course Elin needs money about as much as Jesse James needs another tattoo but she appears to have found true happiness in the arms of one very wealthy Swedish investor and owner of 27 cruise line ships James "Money Man" Dingman, who is regarded as one of the most eligible billionaires on the planet.

Elin and James both share the same love for Beatles songs. Her favorite is "Here Comes The Sun" and his favorite is "Here, There, And Everywhere." Both also love Mexican food and are seriously considering opening up some Mexican food franchises in Stockholm.

A neighbor of Elin's reportedly told a local reporter that a few nights ago she happened to peak into Elin's bedroom window while she was looking for her lost puppy Pittles and she saw Elin and James sensuously snuggling up a storm.

The unidentified neighbor who would only reveal the last letter of her last name (F) remarked that the two looked like they were on their honeymoon.

One other thing that Nordegren said attracted her to Dingman is the fact that he hates golf with a tremendous passion.

SIDENOTE: Elin Nordegren's book based on GolfGate was named the number one selling book of 2010 in Sweden, Finland, Norway, and Chile. Nordegren says she made $2.7 million from her book titled, Dammit, The Bitches Came Out Of The Woodwork.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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