Written by Abel Rodriguez

Thursday, 30 June 2011

image for Justin Theroux Reveals Why He Will Be Dumping Jennifer Aniston Pretty Soon
Jennifer Aniston is 42, and is considered to be one of Tinsel Town's most popular 'cougars.'

HAWAIIAN GARDENS, California - Justin Theroux was in Hawaiian Gardens when he was confronted by a reporter and asked about his relationship with Jennifer Aniston.

Theroux informed the reporter identified as Vodka Vermicelli of iRumors that he was going to be giving her an exclusive.

Miss V, as she is known was thrilled. Justin told her that he was getting ready to go over to Aniston's house and end their relationship.

Miss V was flabbergasted. She asked what had happened. The two were sitting at an outside booth at a local Pizza Gal Restaurant and Justin confessed to Miss V that he decided to break up with Aniston because he did not want to get a reputation as being a guy who likes to date older woman aka cougars.

He said that he had talked to Ashton Kutcher, who is 16 years younger than Demi Moore, on several occasions about that very subject and that AshKut had told him in confidence that he hated it but that he was in too deep to do anything about it now.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: Aniston is 42 and Theroux is 39.]

Justin said that he really likes Jennifer but that she has a very personal and intimate body secret that to say the least shocked him.

He grinned and said that he now knows why Aniston has no trouble getting boyfriends but sure as hell has trouble keeping them.

Some of Jen's past boyfriends include Gerald Butler, John Mayer, Paul Sculfor, Vince Vaughn, Jon Stewart, and of course Brad Pitt, who was actually her husband.

Miss V asked him to explain what he was talking about and he said that he had given Jen his word that he would never reveal her great big secret. He grinned and repeated the words her great big secret as he winked.

July 1st is National Zip Code Day except in the city that uses the zip codes 85001 through 85099.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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