Snooki Arrested Again For Assault After Shitting On Next Door Neighbor

Funny story written by Bureau

Sunday, 21 November 2010

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Our gal Snooki is up to her rear and in some serious shit after she allegedly attacked a woman in a Barnes & Noble bathroom stall.

"I am innocent", stated Snooki, but the police took her in anyway.

According to the story our Clarence Briant sent back to us from New York City, Snooki went into a Barnes & Noble to have some chocolate because it was so cold outside and while there, had to make a hurried dash for the bathrooms in the back.

"I really really had to go", we overheard her tell the police after her victim had been taken out on a stretcher by medics.

Apparently Snooki sat down as soon as she got to the john and with a big sigh of relief, wiped her butt. However, just as she raised up, the automatic toilet flush came on and it startled her so she dropped the partially filled toilet paper into the next stall.

She told police that whoever was in there must have not seen it so she finished her wiping and jumped up before the stranger in the next stall came out.

Only she didn't.

After hearing a terrible scream and a crash, Snooki finally peeked in and saw that the half dressed lady had stepped on the tissue with the doo and slid against the stall, retching her ankle and banging her head on the toilet as it kept flushing over and over.

Someone had seen what had happened and thought that Snooki had attacked the unfortunate lady.

All anyone heard Snooki say as she was escorted out by a policeman was, "I may be full of shit, but that in there was an accident."

So, more public service for Snooki it appears.

This is Clarence Briant for The West Coast Post!

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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