Katie Waissel In X-Factor Top Shop Collapse Hoax

Funny story written by Skoob1999

Thursday, 21 October 2010

image for Katie Waissel In X-Factor Top Shop Collapse Hoax
X-Factor - Too Much Monkey Business

Some people will do absolutely anything in the vainglorious pursuit of fame, fortune, and happiness. Others will do anything in order to manipulate a situation to their advantage in terms of a percentage of the take.

Skoob Entertainment News has heard that the 'collapse' of X-Factor fame junkie Katie Waissel as she collected freebies at a Top Shop (they didn't specify which one) on London's Oxford Street has been wildly exaggerated.

SEN supremo, Buffty Ginslinger, who knows a young lad who regularly dosses down in a nearby doorway, told us that the whole incident was a case of 'minimal event - maximum publicity' and an attempt by the unpopular pop wannabe's X-Factor potential investor (no names mentioned) to garner public sympathy for the hitherto much disliked drama queen.

"Good Lord!" Buffty told us. "The girl simply said that she felt a little woozy, put her hand to her head, and by jingo, before you could shake a ruddy stick, she was surrounded by X-Factor parasites. Young Sebastian - who saw the whole thing through the window as he was bedding down for the evening with his dog - told me that she never even fell over. She just waved everybody away and insisted that she wasn't dying. Then she apparently continued scooping up freebies, and left as normal. The way some unscrupulous sources reported this 'non-incident' it must have appeared that somebody had to use a defibrillator on the silly cow. Nonsense - it's all part of that smoke and mirrors game to try to gain public sympathy because a certain person, or persons (unspecified) have a great deal invested in her. It's all nonsense dear chap. I've had more traumatic experiences having a big shit."

More as we get it

(Hopefully without the 'big shit' reference.)

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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