A waiter at an upscale Malibu bistro reports that Mel Gibson is considering extending an offer of assistance to suspected killer Joran van Der Sloot.
"As I was serving Mr. Gibson and his publicist, I overheard them discussing damage control strategy regarding his image-basic stuff. But I was shocked when I heard Mel say 'Hey what about this...maybe I could help out that kid in trouble down in Peru...what's his name... Joran. Joran Van Der Sloot.'"
The publicist said something about it being a bad idea, but Mel didn't seem convinced. "I don't know", said Mel. "I mean, the kids got a lot of moxie...he reminds me of myself back in the day...clean-cut, don't take no crap from women..."
"The publicist seemed to be as shocked as I was", reports the waiter. "C'mon Mel, we need something positive-how is helping a psychopathic killer going to be good news for our situation?"said the spin Doctor.
"I hear ya" said Mel. "I mean, if the kid really did commit murder, I guess he crossed the line. I was just thinking, you know, sending a lawyer down to help him out...it might be a strong way to show that a guy is innocent until proven guilty. Ya know, like I said, the kid could have a future the way he knows how to handle himself with women".