Zsa Zsa: Bury Me in Hog Jaw Arkansas!

Written by Jean Le Fete

Tuesday, 17 August 2010

image for Zsa Zsa: Bury Me in Hog Jaw Arkansas!
Fergus McCarthy Reads Last Rites to Zsa Zsa Gabor

Little Rock, AR - Last night Zsa Zsa Gabor asked for last rites to be read to her and The Spoof was there to bring you up to date, inaccurate information.

Just as the Catholic Priest named Fergus McCarthy was about to leave Zsa Zsa grabbed him by the collar and pulled down close.

"I have one last request from you darling..." whispered Zsa Zsa.

"I haven't had an erection in 40 years, but for the right price I'll...", said Fergus.

"NO!~,not that," gasped Zsa Zsa.

"Well I don't believe in oral..."

"NOOO!" exclaimed Zsa Zsa, "Why don't you let me finish?"

"Yes of course my child, what is it?" asked Fergus

"I wish to be buried in Hog Jaw, Arkansas."

"You mean that American Spoof Writer enclave, naaah! You don't want to go there, its full of vermin and perverts. Come to Scotland and we'll do you up proper."

"No, it must be Hog Jaw, that's where my latest fiance is darling,"

"I wish you'd quit calling me darling, I'll have to retake my vows after this."

"Yes darling, but only after one more small favor darling. I want to be married in Hog Jaw, before I'm buried, to Mr Charpa93."

"Does Mr. Charpa know about this?"

"That doesn't matter darling, it's in his karma."

"In his what?"

"His Karma, his destiny."

"Wow, didn't know his karma was so bad," replied Fergus.

Zsa Zsa at this point hit Fergus with an empty bed pan.

Just then Bill Clinton and Hillary Clinton entered the room in wedding clothes, "We are here to escort Zsa Zsa to Hog Jaw, her groom is hog tied and waiting. Funny little guy, screamed just like a woman when we jumped him I left Eddie Albert and sister Ava to sit on him 'til we get there. Are you ready to go darling?"

"Why of course darling."

That's it folks, don't miss our part 2 coverage of this breaking story, we'll be covering the wedding of Zsa Zsa Gabor to The Spoof's own Charpa93.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Spoof news topics

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more