Shakira Says That Her World Cup Finals Affair With Spain's Gerard Pique Was Just A Flirtatious Time-Passer

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Tuesday, 10 August 2010

image for Shakira Says That Her World Cup Finals Affair With Spain's Gerard Pique Was Just A Flirtatious Time-Passer
Shakira seen performing her hit "Waka Waka" at The 2010 World Cup Finals in South Africa.

EL PASO - The Colombian hip shaker Shakira had just finished performing to a sold-out crowd at El Paso's La Chupacabra Convention Center when she was asked about her extra curricular activities during the 2010 World Cup Finals which were recently held in South Africa.

Shakira grinned as asked what in particular was being referred to. When told that it concerned her alleged two-day affair with Spanish soccer player Gerard Pique, the belly dancer turned quite pinkish in the face as well as in the belly.

She replied in broken English that she has known Jerry for many years, ever since he gave her a young pet fighting bull when she turned 30, three years ago.

Shakira said that Jerry is 23, and she is 33, and that she is old enough to be Pique's older hermana (sister). When told that it's true but that neither one resides in Arkansas Shakira's face and belly again turned pink.

The Colombian born singer/dancer said that she simply went to South Africa in order to sing the event's theme song "Waka Waka."

The song was co-written by Kara DioGuardi, who was recently fired from her job as judge on American Idol, and Neil Sedaka, who actually early on in his career wrote a military recruitment song that was recorded by the Civil War Singing General Trio of Ulysses Grant, Phil Sheridan, and William Sherman.

Shakira was asked what the name "Waka Waka" means. She giggled and said that she herself had asked both Kara and Neil and they told her that the song tells the story of a young African lion who is abandoned by a one-ring circus just outside of Cape Town.

The lion eludes dozens of hunters and one day after wandering aimlessly finds that he has traveled all the way to Soho, England.

He is soon captured by three members of Scotland Yard's finest and sold to The Ringling Brothers and Barnum And Bailey Circus in America.

One of the circus clowns named "Puddles" names him Fifo-Fifo, which is Ugandan for young lion with hellacious callouses on his paws attained from walking thousands of miles from South Africa to England.

Fifo Fifo is the Ugandan translation for Waka Waka which is Kenyan.

SIDENOTE: Shakira said that when she was with Jerry that she had her eyes closed and she was not thinking about him because she was thinking about the words to her latest song, entitled "Las Palabras Estan En La Punta De Mi Lengua." (The Words Are On The Tip Of My Tongue).

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more