LONDON - Fresh on the heels of her undercover sting operation now comes the latest allegations from the soap opera world of Sarah Ferguson, alias "The Duchess of York," who some are now referring to as "The Duchess of Pork."
One of the world's most famous red heads, next to Lucy, Nicole, Marcia, and Lindsay, she has just gone and done stepped smack dab in the middle of it (as they say in Texas).
That Ferguson woman keeps on shocking and shocking with her once-secret revelations as if she were in the same league as professional skanks like Lindsay Lohan, Courtney Love, and Madonna.
And now comes rumor that "La Fergie" slept with two extremely wealthy oil-related gentlemen whom she says were friends who were in need of female companionship and knew that she was in need of monetary companionship and viola, there you have it - an instant example of the old you scratch my (blank) and I'll pay you $450,000.
This latest example of the old cliche, 'tit for tat,' or maybe to be more accurate 'gash for cash' has come right out of leftfield.
But the question still remains, if the gal pal of who knows how many gents was paid $450,000 how come she is broke and having to wear $13 dresses from Wal-Mart.
Is it an example of the classic 'me thinks dat da lady she be lying through her money making mouth?'
At any rate, Sarah "The Duchess of Pork" is going to be making the rounds again and telling her interviewer, like she did to Oprah "The Big Black Mama" Winfrey that she feels sorry for the girl in the video. The girl in the video is so sad. The girl in the video is acting like some kind of little lamb who has lost her way.
Even Great Britain's world famous interviewer David Frost is totally puzzled by this latest manifestation. Frost reportedly told a close friend of his Sarah Harding of the all-female band Girls Aloud "Blimey Sarah can you believe the antics of that twat Sarah."
"What did you call me David?"
"Oh...No I meant that twat Sarah, the other one...the other Sarah. I mean the one with the red hair, and the big bug eyes, and the big Oprah butt. You know the one with the princess crown or the ex-princess crown."
"David. Stop. Stop. Stop. You are starting to irritate the effen hell out of me. So Stop."
Frost sat down in his chair. Lit a cigarette and started talking about Richard Nixon. "You know Sarah, I knew the man. I met him. I interviewed him. And I, little David Frost kicked Tricky Dicky's bloomin' ass all the way from California to Alaska."
In a related story. Reports that Queen Elizabeth II, fainted upon hearing about her ex-daughter-in-laws latest sexual antics have not been substantiated as of yet. We are still awaiting the email from Prince Phillip.
