Sarah Ferguson On Oprah - Unforgiven

Funny story written by Skoob1999

Thursday, 3 June 2010

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I'm Sooo Soweee! Please Forgive Me! - (Did that work?)

It seems that US audiences weren't fooled by Sarah Ferguson's excuses for accepting $40,000 for a meet with her ex-husband, Prince Andrew, on the Oprah show recently. By attempting to imply that she'd only accepted the access money in order to help out a friend in financial trouble - a line even a catfish would find hard to swallow - Ferguson went on to avoid any relevant questions, and tried to explain the whole deal by saying she was drunk at the time.

"Drunk?" Annabelle Fitzherbert of the Philadelphia Fitzherberts snorted at the man in Philly. "I've never seen a drunk's eyes light up like hers did when they put the 40k on the table. And she didn't seem to be exactly lurching around as she took the case with the money in it and hotfooted it to the door. The woman's a disgrace to the Royals. And to her country. She just wants to abuse her Royal connections in order to part gullible Americans from their money. Our chums across the pond have known what she's like for years. This shameful episode serves only to confirm that view."

My London source, eccentric English film producer/director Buffty Ginslinger told us from a seedy Soho bar in old London:

"Until now, you Yanks have taken everything she says as gospel. But you should never, ever, under any circumstances put your faith in a has-been ginger bird with a fat arse. It's just common sense."

"She's lost all credibility with me," wino Mad Raving Albert with the big shopping cart told us as he pounded his West Hollywood beat looking for empty cans. "To be honest witcha, I was always a little dubious about the red hair and the big ass. And the lyin' eyes. Over for me."

And it seems a lot of Americans feel the same - cheated by somebody they'd allowed into their collective, well meaning hearts. And the American public can be very unforgiving.

Particularly where lard-assed redhead issue fudgers are concerned.

More as we get it.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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