Sarah Harding And N-Dubz In Pub Business Meeting Bust-Up

Written by Skoob1999

Wednesday, 28 April 2010


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Buffty's Nephew, Trevor, Performing With His Rap Crew N-Tolerance

Our man in the pub, eccentric British film director Buffty Ginslinger reports that he saw Sarah Harding in a business meeting at a West End pub with Camden rappers N-Dubz, although Harding appeared more enthusiastic about the drinks on offer than the meeting's agenda.

Bikini babe and St Trinian's actress Harding, who also sings with Girls Aloud from time to time, has expressed her dissatisfaction with the press recently, complaining that she is all too often portrayed as a shallow good time party girl.

Having recently declared her aspirations towards becoming a serious actress, Harding is keen to promote the image of a home loving young lady, concentrating hard on developing her acting skills.

So does the meeting with N-Dubz imply that the divine Sarah is considering a serious musical departure from the pop saccharine inanity of Girls Aloud?

"She wouldn't say," Buffty Ginslinger told me. "When I tried to ask her, she called me a drunken old fool and told me to sod off. So I sodded off. It wasn't so much her I was worried about, as N-Dubz. You see, I once described Dappy as "The Twat In The Hat" and apparently he didn't like it. I'm told he has some proper hardcore gangsta contacts and that there's a contract out on my mustache. Of course, it didn't help when I wrote in the Daily Blagger that Tulisa dresses like a slapper and reinforces negative sexual stereotyping as personified by rap music. Oh, and I called Fazer a 'jumped up little shitbag' in that article too. I hear he's prepared to pay a hit-man to tie my shoe laces together. So, as you can imagine, I was as welcome in their company as a skid-mark on a napkin. Tell you what, hang around and I'll bring you some new dirt on Cheryl Cole."

At this, Buffty Ginslinger went into the Paralytic Plasterer public house in search of any further whiff of scandal.

Look out for the sparks. They will fly.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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