London - (Lava Palaver): Blaming a lack of any discernible transatlantic flights in the forseeable future Paranoid studio bosses have cancelled next Monday's Iron Man 2 London premiere.
The Jon Favreau-directed blockbuster plot concerns some bloke 'too lazy to do his own goddam ironing' who has a fling with an able and all too willing laundrette attendant.
It stars Robert Downey Jr, Gwyneth Paltrow (yawn...), Scarlett Johansson, Mickey Rourke and Samuel L Jackson and will now launch in LA.
London fans on the whole aren't that bothered.
Over exposure to vapid has-been actress Gwynnie and a sudden allergy onset to Robert Downey Jr has left the vast majority of movie-going fans ambivalent.
"I blame toxic fallout from her torpid role in The Royal Tenenbaums," movie goer Dave Maggot commented today.
"Plus she was rubbish in The Talented Mr Ripley."
The London cancellation was to have been held in tacky West London shopping mall Westfield.
The venue will instead hold a morris dancing festival dedicated to the goddess of volcanic pollution.
Joanna Lumley is 104.