NEW YORK CITY - Well Sharon "The Sniffle Skank" Osbourne finally decided to return to The Celebrity Apprentice after missing two shows with what she called a case of the 'flu bug.'
Donald Trump told his daughter Ivanka that he personally feels that it is something much more than just a little flu bug.
He informed her that he would tell her later what the word is when they go out to dinner (her turn to pay) and there are no cameras and microphones around.
Ivanka, who is a very curious 5 foot 11 inch tall blonde quasi-Barbie Doll type, asked her daddy if the word that he is talking about begins with the letter "D."
The Trumpster smiled, dabbed his one-of-a-kind hairdo, and winked. Ivanka made a mouth-zipping movement with her right index finger and right thumb.
Meanwhile Cyndi Lauper, the females project manager, is still fussing, fighting, and feuding with fellow teammate Holly Robinson Peete, a third-rate, arrogant, conceited, actress who is not even good enough to wash Sandra Bullock's size A-cup bra.
WWE diva, the extremely well-endowed, in the doo dah's department, Maria Kanellis remarked that she cannot stand Cyndi Lauper and vice versa.
[EDITOR'S NOTE: Personally I don't think that vice versa is such a bad person. Granted she does have a horrible Greek accent, chin hair, and inverted nipples but outside of that she is pretty much okay.]
And over on the male team, we have wrestling champion Bill Goldberg, who has more muscles than all of the Osmond family put together.
Goldberg is noted for once single-handedly defeating 24 other wrestlers, including three topless women, in a caged match in Dubai, India.
Another mens team member is the lead singer for the rock band Poison Bret Michaels, who admits on the website to having over 7,000 groupies.
Also on project manager Goldberg's team is Curtis Stone, a celebrity chef, who can take possum road kill, and in under two hours, have it tasting like the world's best Fettuccine Alfredo.
Stone said that Bret Michaels and Michael Johnson spent way too much time talking about the celebs on Dancing With The Stars and in particular, about Pamela Anderson's amazing sweater bullets.
Michael Johnson stated that he does not like Goldberg because whereas sprint racing is real, wrestling is as fake as Glenn Beck's tears, Britney Spears live singing, or Heidi Montag's tits, ass, thighs, labia minora, labia majora, G-spot, nipples, and doctor of dentistry degree.
The semi-conceited Olympic Gold Medal sprinter confesses that he is so damn good that he has won each one of the 3,245 races that he has ever run. He then added that, that includes the final race at the 2009 Zimbabwe Invitational when in the middle of a 100 yard dash he was actually attacked and bitten by a lion.
SIDENOTE: After all of the backstabbing dust had settled Donald Trump ended up firing wrestling champ Goldberg. But due to the fact that Trump knows about Goldberg's legendary temper, he did not fire him live on the show but instead fired him via an email.
