LONDON - The Fourth season of ITV1's Britain's Got Talent kicked off with quite a British bang, as Wolverhampton native Chloe Hickinbottom brought down the house with her rendition of "The White Cliffs Of Dover."
The young schoolgirl was asked by BGT judge Amanda Holden where in the world she learned to sing like that and Chloe replied that she learned from listening to her grandfather's old Englebert Humperdinck albums.
Little Hickinbottom added that she first learned the words to "Release Me And Let Me Love Again" when she was only five weeks old.
Judge Piers Morgan said that she can sing better than most women who are in their 40s and 50s. He even said that she can even sing much better than Amanda Holden, although she isn't quite as pretty as Amanda is.
Simon Cowell, the third BGT judge missed the show due to being laid up with a horrible case of athlete's foot. Louis Walsh, who substituted for Simon "The Count of Criticism" Cowell remarked to little Chloe that she has a bloomingly damn good effen chance of winning the top prize of £100,000 [$152,000 U.S.]
Walsh said that in his opinion Hickinbottom will become more popular than Susan Boyle. Louis smiled and then noted that Chloe is a heck of a lot prettier than Boyle and no where near as fat.
He then pointed out that even though she kind of dresses like SuBo did last year, at least she doesn't have Boyle's conceited-arse personality and diva aura about her.
Little Chloe was asked, by the shows director Radford St. Guyler, what song she plans on singing on next weeks show.
She smiled and said that she has not yet decided, but added that she has narrowed it down to three songs. The first is Amy Winehouse's "Rehab." The second one is Katy Perry's "I Kissed A Girl." And the third choice is "Who Let The Dogs Out" by Baha Men.
In other news. Scientists have stated that the gigantic volcanic ash cloud from Iceland's Eyjafjallajokull can now actually be seen from Venus.