LONDON - Amanda Holden, the female judge on Britain's Got Talent, has had her dream of performing on the stage at the Moulin Rouge in Paris shattered.
The manager of the Moulin Rouge Edouard-LaSalle St. Yves said that he was sorry that he had to reject Miss Holden's request to perform on the world famous stage.
St. Yves stated that Le Rouge, as locals call it, has a strict policy that all of the girls who appear on its stage must be at least 5 foot 7.
Amanda Holden stands 5 foot 4 or a full three inches below the established required height.
Miss Holden was furious when she was notified of her rejection. She reportedly said that she has been told by a lot of people that she probably has two of the most beautiful legs in all of London.
An ex-boyfriend, Nigel Piccadilly was asked to comment on Amanda's legs and he said that not only are Mandy's legs beautiful, they are also the most delicious set of legs that he has ever tasted.
When asked how many pairs of legs he has tasted Piccadilly replied that the number was probably somewhere around 170.
Nigel was asked that out of the roughly 170 how many actually allowed him to taste their legs. He thought for a moment and then replied 167.
Miss Holden said in a somewhat sarcastic manner that in order for a woman to be allowed to even set foot on the Moulin Rouge stage she must stand at least 5 foot 11 and have legs that go up all the way to her nostrils.
Miss Holden asked Mr. St. Yves if he would be willing to make an exception seeing as how she is a very popular star, who each week is watched by millions, and who was recently voted by the male readers of Femme Qui Est Jolie Magazine as The Woman We Would Most Like To Be Stranded On A Boat Out In The Middle of The English Channel With.
Mr. St. Yves replied "Non!" (No!).
In a related story. The French government has ordered a recall on 2.7 million bottles of French Dressing. Apparently some of the bottles have been found to contain Anaster AS-09, which is a strong anabolic steroid that is commonly administered to zoo hippos in order to make their hides as hard as mosaic tile.
