Kate Gosselin Beats Simon Cowell as Meanest Person on TV

Written by Charpa93

Sunday, 4 April 2010

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For the first time in history, well recent popular television history anyway, not real history that actually means anything, Dancing with the Stars beat out American Idol as having the most viewers.

Some say the three divas heading up the dance pairings, i.e. Pamela Anderson, Shannen Doherty and Kate Gosselin, especially Kate Gosselin, are the reason for the ratings spike.

Now, before Kate gets a big head or anything, we must explain something. People are seemingly tuning in to see Kate get booted not to actually see some quality dancing.

Said a DWTS spokesperson, "it is definitely a double-edged sword in Kate's case because on the one hand, no one in their right mind would tune into a television show to watch a woman butcher a cha-cha or a tango like Kate can do, but on the other hand, the thrill of being in front of your television set when Kate finally gets the axe and waiting for her reaction makes everyone and her brother want to watch. We definitely chose the right woman to hate for our viewers; that is for darn sure."

DWTS then, of course, is going to do everything in their power to keep Kate on no matter how awful her dancing, because without Kate haters, there is no audience and they know that. So the question becomes "when does a dance show stop becoming a dance show and start becoming just another platform to showcase Kate Gosselin's awful temper?"

Guess we can only find out by watching DWTS the entire season because this reviewer doesn't see her getting the boot when ratings are so high unless, of course, someone comes to their senses and decides to choose quality over ratings, and that just ain't bloody likely.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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