Written by Abel Rodriguez

Tuesday, 30 March 2010

image for Simon Cowell's Ex-Girlfriend Pixie Lott Has Nude Photos of Him She Wants To Sell Him
19-year-old Pixie Lott showing what once belonged exclusively to Simon Cowell.

LONDON - Last summer Simon Cowell and singer Pixie Lott were quite an item.

Cowell and Lott were both virtually inseparable even though there was a 30 year age difference between them. Lott and Cowell did have similar interests. Pixie liked to wear sexy little miniskirts, short shorts, and bikini thong panties and Simon liked to take off her sexy little miniskirts, short shorts, and bikini thong panties.

The two were even voted The Happiest Couple of The Year by The Liverpool Scouser Gazette.

The Twickenham Times Telegram stated in an editorial that they had never seen Simon Cowell happier or with more crotch bulges than when he was with Pixie.

But as so often happens. The happy as a woodpecker in a chopstick factory couple soon grew apart. Simon left for American to appear on American Idol and soon began flirting with Kara DioGuardi and Lott stayed in London and soon began flirting with X-Factor judge Louis Walsh.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: Yes, it definitely sounds ridiculous that Pixie Lott would even give that kangaroo arse-looking bloke the time of day, much less her cute little woo-woo (tuzzy muzzy).]

Lott asked Cowell to return to England and to once again find the spark that their May-December romance had. Cowell said that if he could be honest, "No."

An inside source said that Pixie reminded Simon about the three dozen entirely nude photos of him she had taken the night they had returned from Mick Jagger's birthday party.

Lott pointed out that she would be willing to sell the entire lot (no pun intended) for the 'fair' price of £200,000 [$300,000 U.S.].

SIDENOTE: Simon Cowell's maid reportedly told CNN's Anderson Cooper that Cowell wrote Pixie Lott a check for £200,000 aka $300,000 the very next day.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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