HOLLYWOOD HILLS - Actress Pamela Anderson, who is considered one of the country's most sexually active females has said that she really and truly wants to help Jon Gosselin.
Ms. Anderson said that she read where Gosselin's ex-girlfriend Hailey Glassman said that Jon's 'little Gosselin' only measures 3 inches.
Pamela said that first of all Glassman is a bitch for making a remark like that. Anderson said that it has been her experience that when a woman mentions a man's 'under-endowment' it is usually because she has quite a 'Grand Canyon' when it comes to her 'bippity bippity.'
[EDITOR'S NOTE: I'm an old fella and I honestly do not recall ever hearing a man or even a woman call her vagina a 'bippity bippity' but hey, Anderson has been around so we will go with her exact redundant name 'bippity bippity.']
Pamela Anderson who has starred in such films as Scary Movie 3, Scooby Doo, and Scooby Doo 2 - The Doggy Gets Neutered, said that she is willing to help Jon (Gosselin) with his 'little' problem.
The 42-year-old Anderson said that just one date with her and Jon's 'little Jon' will go from a "3" to a "4."
When asked what technique she could possibly use to make that happen Pamela just smiled and said that she has gone out on dates and afterwards guys have gone from a "4" to a "5", a "5" to a "6", and a "6" to a "7."
In other news. Former actor Billy Bob Thornton said that his autobiography will be in bookstores in mid March. The book is entitled, "2009 - The Year I Made A Complete Ass Of Myself Up In Canada And Everyone Forgot About Me Like That."