LAS VEGAS - After performing together for 37 years, and going through 817 tigers, and over 7,000 Revlon products, Siegfried Fischbacher and Roy Horn have decided to hang up their magic wands.
The two popular Las Vegas showmen who performed illusions and magic using white tigers decided to retire because it was becoming more and more difficult to make the tigers obey. Plus it was getting hard as hell to safely maneuver their walkers in the tiger cage.
Siegfried said that when Roy was attacked in 2003, by one of their nicer tigers it showed them both that the magic had started to leave their wands.
Roy was quick to add that because of the economic recession it had become very expensive to purchase tiger food, tiger medicine, and tiger toys.
He said that he could not believe how expensive tiger toys had gotten. He pointed out that most tiger toys use to take four double A batteries, but now because of more advanced technology the average tiger toy requires fourteen double A batteries.
When asked what they are going to do now that they will no longer be performing Roy smiled, looked over at his life time partner and said that they'll just hang around their $7.2 million mansion and read the books that will soon be coming out on their all-time favorite tiger, Tiger Woods.
In other news. Actor Peter Coyote has said that he has decided to finally change his first name. He said that he is fed up with the vulgar white page telephone listing joke punchline: Coyote, Peter.
