Rod Hull Is Alive. Then He's Not.

Funny story written by Nick Hobbs

Monday, 16 November 2009

image for Rod Hull Is Alive. Then He's Not.
An Emu. Unavailable for comment. Hand just out of shot.

For two days the world was on the edge of it's seat. It was believed that the popular and much loved children's TV presenter and Emu worrier Rod Hull was alive and well and not dead.

However, investigations into the exact circumstances of the rumours have today been revealed as a mere printing error.

A letter regarding mistreatment of birds at a local Emu farm was sent in to The Daily Horn, a local newspaper in Grimsby. The letter claimed that the writer had for years himself worked with the birds, and he knew them to be a very calm creature of habit.

The letter continued that although the writer had "recently moved away from his lovely windmill because of the witch" he would not give up his dream of returning to his passion of Emu rearing.

The letter was signed off by Rod Hull. After extensive investigation I can reveal that the story was infact written by Rod Sanderpants.

Rod used to own the Waltham windmill near Grimsby (which is not pink), until 2003 when a messy divorce meant he had to move away, the court finding in favour with his ex-wife, or the witch as he refers to her (not infact a green skinned lard arse called Grotbags). Rod now lives and works just down the road in Hull. When the letter went to print they missed out the comma, so it read 'Rod Hull' instead of 'Rod, Hull'.

It is so easy in these times of depression to cling to some hope that our heroes will never die, that our childhood idols will some how live on forever.

They won't.

Except maybe Brucie.

Oh and the only original one left off of Last Of The Summer Wine.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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