Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson join a lesbian gang

Funny story written by howy

Saturday, 7 November 2009

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Lindsay Lohan and her make believe husband Samantha Ronson got initiated into a lesbian gang that goes by the name DTO "Dykes Take Over"

The gang that Lohan and Ronson got involved with is notorious for driving through neighborhoods in search of new recruits.

To become a member of the lesbian gang the female recruit needs to perform like a man while she satisfies thirty female members of the gang in an orgy that lasts four hours. The female recruit performs the same services that a man would and she is never touched or handled because she is the one that is sacrificing herself to make the members feel like women.

Most males get confused about the initiation process and only a female can understand the process. Women like all females in the animal kingdom are DNA programmed by evolution to be receptive submissive. Males on the other hand are copulative submissive. In evolution this is an energy saving way to reproduce a life-form such as a human being.

The lesbian members of the gang are promised a life time of receptive sex every time they recruit willing partners. Amy Buckle a member of the gang explains, "There are two types of virginity that a woman has.' 'When a woman has sex with a man for the first time that is one virginity she loses and when a woman uses her finger on a woman for the first time it is her second virginity she loses which is called a "lesbian virginity.' 'Members of DTO are never made to play the role of a man twice; they are allowed to find gullible butch ladies and new recruits who play that role for the whole gang.'"

Buckle says she is acquainted with Lohan and Ronson and she has seen them patrolling the streets looking for gullible recruits.

Buckle tries to explain it by saying, "It's the same thing a man experiences if he is initiated into a homosexual gang for the first time and he plays the role of a female by bending over for an hour, but then is allowed to play the role of a male during his entire time in the gang."

Amy Buckle says the trick is to find fresh recruits or to hang on to a tomboy lesbian that is fearful and is willing to satisfy the whole lesbian gang just to keep her friends.

Buckle says DTO is feared by thousands of straight women who are hysterically paranoid and who could become dangerous if they become defensive.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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