Written by Bureau

Thursday, 5 November 2009

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image for Amy Winehouse Knocks Herself Out!

In a freak accident Monday, (the only kind Amy Winehouse, ever seems to have) Amy Winehouse was found unconscious on the street in New York as taxi cabs swerved to miss her.

Finally, a person who had ran out to clean windshields for a small fee, helped the singer back to the sidewalk and squirted her in the face with his water bottle.

Then he asked for money, palm up.

She hacked and spit into it.

"Squirt me in the face will you, Clown?" observers stated that she told the man who may have saved her life but has died from alcohol poisoning before we could interview him.

"I didn't know what had happened", Winehouse later told this reporter only this morning. "I guess the poor alcoholic asshole DID save my life."

When asked how she came to be passed out on the street, Winehouse stated that she didn't know, but DID recall just missing a downtown bus and that the last thing she could remember, she was chasing after it.

"Probably one of those hell-bent taxis that storm up and door the streets gibbering like monkeys!"

However, two more men of the street came forward and told police officers yesterday that they saw the whole thing and that "Ms. Wine House boobs had bounced so much they knocked her cold."

"Hey, I ain't used to these big babies yet", Winehouse reportedly responded when told.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: Amy Winehouse




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