Economy Causes Edgar Winter Group to Discontinue Free Rides

Funny story written by Woodward N. Bernstein

Tuesday, 14 July 2009

image for Economy Causes Edgar Winter Group to Discontinue Free Rides

In May of 1973, the Edgar Winter Group won over scores of fans with their upbeat music, carefree style, and promise of a free ride. When the group itself disbanded, its members pledged to continue offering free rides as long as they received mainstream airplay. Sadly, as of this Friday that promise will be broken.

"This was a very difficult decision for us," former front man Edgar Winter said at a press conference Monday afternoon. ""Free Ride' was excellent marketing, and we sold a lot of records thanks to that. But times are hard and tastes change, and it's just no longer feasible. When I think of the revenue we've lost just this's incredible."

The group's erstwhile members collaborated to decide on a new rate for the foreseeable future: fifty cents.

"Compared to the cost of most rides, our pricing is still very competitive," Winter hastily pointed out. "We've considered re-recording the single with lyrics that reflect the change. It's just that singing 'come on and take a cheap ride' just doesn't seem tasteful."

In the immediate wake of the announcement, one of the Edgar Winter Group's contemporaries was quick to release a statement of their own. Foghat reassured its listeners that it will continue to offer slow rides, on which one can take it easy.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more