Sir Paul McCartney Battles With Rush Limbaugh Over Going Meatless

Funny story written by Bureau

Tuesday, 16 June 2009

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Sir Paul McCartney has been joined by his daughters Mary and Stella McCartney, Yoko Ono, Moby, Kate Bosworth and others as he launched his Meat Free Mondays campaign, that's already being protested by butchers everywhere.

"It's hard enough to make a living in this economy", stated one George Wanker, aka The Meat Man Of Massachusetts. "Now this foreigner wants us to close one day a week? What are we to sell, tofu" I'd sooner eat a corn turd!"

"A grand Tofurky up yours, Sir Paul!"

Meanwhile the McCartney gathering was being addressed by Sir Paul.

"I think many of us here and in most of the western world feel completely helpless in the face of our great environmental challenges, and it can be hard to know how to sort through the advice about what we can do to make a meaningful contribution to a cleaner, more sustainable, healthier world."

"However, having one designated meat free day a week is actually a meaningful change that everyone can make, that goes to the very heart of several important political, environmental and ethical issues all at once."

Upon hearing the news, Talk Show host Rush Limbaugh has responded by eating all the meat he can, declaring Monday's "Chicken Wing Sports Night!"

However, several leading chefs say they agree with Sir Paul and have created vegetarian recipes for Meatless Mondays.

"By eating tree nuts instead of hog nuts can even appeal to some of us Limbaugh's listeners", stated one Ditto Head, his mouth full of Tofu Chittlin's fried in bacon grease. "We can eat the bacon tomorrow."

"Well, Sir Paul can go meatless if he wants, but I'm humping Annabelle right after she gets home, even if it IS no-meat Monday", replied another.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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