LOS ANGELES - Phil Spector, former record producer and convicted murderer, will host a no-talent reality show from United States Penitentiary (USP) - Victorville. Tentatively called 'Tiny Talent Time', the show will feature performances of rejects from other talent shows and be broadcast on a weekly basis.
Each week, five talent show rejects will recreate performances that earned them their notoriety accompanied by some of the worst studio musicians that troll the backwaters of the Los Angeles music scene. The judges, retired ex-Hollywood Squares celebrities, some of whom will be deliberating from their death beds, will give caustic appraisals of the performances, reminding the audience why the contestant was banished from the high paying world of celebrity. The judges then will pick the worst contestant of the five who will move on to the final.
The final will be broadcast Christmas Eve, 2009 during prime time. The sponsor will be a major department store chain known for it's poor remuneration practices, and also known for selling poor quality, imitation products shipped from a communist country in Asia.
All proceeds generated will go to a host of charities that have humongous administrative overheads where little or no money actually goes to the intended recipients.
The winner of the show will be rewarded by getting to spend Christmas Day with Phil Spector in an undisclosed solitary confinement area of Victorville Penitentiary.