Written by Bureau

Monday, 6 April 2009


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image for C.W.'s Next Top Model To Try It Again!
Hopeful Model

Tyra Banks is once more going to try to give her New York auditions another shot after the first auditions turned into a mob scene a few weeks ago when a stampede started almost on the scale of last year's herd through WalMart for Christmas shopping.

Although, this time, it seems like they've got a better plan of attack, or rather, avoiding an attack!

"First of all, if you're under 5 foot 6 and weigh over 120 pounds you may as well stay home. You have no place here. You're one of the 'Normal' everyday people. You're a dime a dozen so don't get your knickers in a wad or your tits in a wringer. Having small tits, by the way, is a plus here. So you cows can head back over to the milk factory," one producer told a large group already hanging around.

"Now try to be a little courteous to those around you."

According to the CW, potential contestants will not be allowed to line up overnight, instead they can begin lining up at 6:00am in the morning. At 7:00am, producers will hand out wristbands with audition times, and candidates with later times will be asked to leave and return again later.

Additionally, you won't be able to line up with your entourage, unless you're under 18.

"You have to be tough", stated Tyra or Tyrannosaurus Sex as some have fondly come to know her.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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