The second cousin of Miley Cyrus is furious at all the fame and attention her relative is getting worldwide.
Cindy Cyrus - who is the daughter of Miley's father's younger sister - lives in a trailer park in Mobil, Alabama with her collection of cats. She's watched her cousin rise to the pinnacle of the entertainment business while she has struggled to survive on food she's stolen from local stores.
"It's kinda hard seeing as we both grew up together. She was always much prettier than me. And she had fewer warts. And smelled better too," said Cindy.
The two seldom communicate since Miley's rapid rise to super stardom.
"I invited her to my 16th birthday party. She never turned up. We had cake", sobbed Cindy.
There lives could not be any more different.
While Miley is away partying with the likes of the the Jonas Brothers, the cast from High School Musical and the Michael Jackson, Cindy drinks warm beer from plastic containers under a tree with her pals Stinky Nick, Gay Zac and Michael the pedophile.