Singer and poet and Latin scholar and impressionist painter Amy Winebox will not face any hype today, according to her agent, Mr. Highpipe.
Speaking from his drugs rehabilitation unit, Mr. Highpipe said: 'Got any Richard Bacon foil, man, I need a buzz.' And he added: 'Oh Amy, yeah, it's been hard work making a completely boring and untalented person like her famous. I even got her talked about in America!'
This is not the first time Mr. Highpipe has made a totally dull non-entity newsworthy, as his previous clients include Mick Jagger, John Major, Hillary Clinton, and the entire Bush family. But Miss Winebox may not be in the news much longer, as a dog may bark at night in Lancashire, or somewhere, and make more interesting reading.
In a brief contrived interview, she snapped at this reporter: 'Shout rant drugs, accidentally filmed myself, clear off, grrrr rant, storm out of the interview, angry sneer, too much eye shadow!'
And fellow non-entity, Pete Thingummy, said: 'Never heard of her, does she play for Everton?'
But a spokesdruggie for Amy's Polybore record company added: 'Yawnnn ....'
Keith Richards is 234 this week.