Heather Mills to blame as McCartney emasculated and Ringo beheaded like Thatcher

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Tuesday, 8 April 2008

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The sculptures were erected not far from this iconic Liverpool location

Liverpool - (Sordid Mess): Scouser tongues are wagging and pointing the finger at Heather Mills after a 30 foot tall Beatles topiary was tampered with, emasculating Paul McCartney of his manhood and decapitating Ringo Starr 'just like Margaret Thatcher' in the House of Lords.

The foliage sculpture is part of the Liverpool 2008 City of Culture Vultures exhibition just outside John Lennon Airport.

And locals are blaming Mills after a discarded wooden leg was found in the undergrowth nearby.

"I think it's a great shame," Toxteth local Dave Scouse said today, "because we'd just seen a pair of great tits nesting in Paul's crotch.

"Now all those little chicks will be homeless."

Liverpool City Council authorities said it will take a long time to grow a replacement pair of balls and a new head for the sculptures, "unless of course the cultprit returns them immediately."

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