In a desperate effort to avoid loss of advertising revenues, dozens of Indians have been drafted in by producers to replace striking Hollywood scriptwriters.
Some dramas will have new plot lines. The season premiere of Lost will open with leading character Jack marrying island sweetheart Kate, performing a 20 minute dance with his wife at the Taj Mahal and then in Switzerland, before being brutally killed by villain Ben, who spirits Kate away and brainwashes her.
The episode finishes with Sun giving birth to the reincarnated spirit of Jack, named Rahul and played by actor Shah Rukh Khan, who only discovers who he is on his 18th birthday and swears revenge against Ben and the Others.
Meanwhile, Hurley turns out to be an Indian police inspector who pretended to win the lottery in order to infiltrate a gang of smugglers coincidentally led by Ben. Sayid turns out to be Jack's long-lost brother who was always in love with Kate.
Locke discovers that Ben was responsible for his hair loss and also swears revenge against Ben. Meanwhile, Ben grows into his role as an arch villain by acquiring a moustache and an evil laugh.
In Desperate Housewives, all the female characters stop sleeping around and start cooking chapattis, except for Edie, who becomes the chief executive of a large modelling agency and tries to destroy Gabbie for stealing Carlos from her.
Gabbie throws away her skimpy dresses and adorns a white saree in respect for her dead husband Victor. Susan goes to live with Mike's parents in an extended family. Bree gives up guns and opens a shelter for orphans.
One of the new writers drafted in from Mumbai told us:
"The scripts will definitely be a hit, yar! They are too good."
