Hitler Announces Comeback

Written by jakl891

Sunday, 16 September 2007


The story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you wish to back out now, please click here to go back to the home page.

image for Hitler Announces Comeback

Recently, it has become quite de riguer for washed up/drugged up/dead celebrities to attempt a momentous comeback in order to get back into the limelight. Memorable examples include Peter Andre ("the most unwelcome comeback since Jimmy Hendrix's vomit -Mark Lamaar), Britney Spears (not anymore, love, please) and the whole of the Rolling Stones, who have kept coming back like a legion of undead since 1982.

One of the most surprising of these comebacks however, is one Adolf Hitler.

Hitler, aged 118, has recently stated in a press conference that he will return.

"I have decided zat being in hiding vas not good vor miner public image, and zat mine public und I should get closer so zat we can understand each ozzer better and zat I can get a better idea of vat miner people vant."

When asked about whether his opinions had changed regarding "ethnic cleansing" he replied: "Yes, ze have. Now, instead of ze whole Auswitchz business, i use Daz:Ethnic Cleanser." Some assumed Hitler was selling out at this point, to which he replied "Only joking".

Nobody laughed at what was a typical German joke.

Critics are saying this return will perhaps hail the start of a Third World War, but the Ministry of Defence is sceptical.One ministry official was quoted as saying "Two World Wars, one world cup. We maybe be crap at our national sport [football] but we are much better at their national sport [war]."

And what does the Jewish community think of the return? "I'm shaking in my skull-cap", quoted an anonymous Rabbi as he was stopped outside a synagogue.

So there you have it, no one really gives a toss.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Spoof news topics

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more