Man Vs Wild Quietly Disappears

Funny story written by drugtestallpoliticians

Thursday, 30 August 2007

image for Man Vs Wild Quietly Disappears

TV Land, Ether Island (IP) - Our entertainment reporter recently noticed that the television show, Man Vs Wild has disappeared into thin air. It has gone the way of the DoDo bird, the Edsel, and the bird flu never to be seen nor heard from again. The Undiscovery channel's pusillanimous executives accomplished what the elements braved by Bear Grylls could never do.

Television networks are bigger and mightier than any viewer or fan. They don't have to answer to anyone. The viewer's function is to be drawn in and influenced by inane and wastefully expensive TV commercials.

Commercials make you run out and buy a $30,000 car when you already have a perfectly good car that is already paid for and they make more expensive name brands taste better than cheaper generic items. They also establish what beautiful is supposed to look like. By presenting models used in TV commercials as thin, that establishes a base line for what beautiful is supposed to look like.

In a frantic effort to mirror the appearance of models presented by the advertising world folks run out and get needless cosmetic surgery and end up with American only diseases like bulimia and anorexia. Television viewers are unknowingly worshipping at the altar of cultural expectations. They end up uglier than before or maybe sick, disfigured, or dead.

Man Vs Wild would probably save lives in the long run even if its star was less than perfect and has committed the sin of briefly seeking comfort where discomfort was expected by folks sitting around in leather covered seats in a 74 degree air conditioned office up high in a lofty skyscaper made of plastic and steel.

His methods were sound and of value and were merely representations and simulations of what to do when you get washed down Shit creek without a paddle. The producers of Man Vs Wild are like the frantic and fanatic fundamentalists who wrongly interpret the bible and other supposed good books in a literal sense instead of understanding that the stories presented there by other MEN are merely parables designed to teach useful things to the masses which are mostly comprised of the lowest common denominator intellectually and otherwise. That is why you always hear nothing but the same old dozen songs repeated constantly on so called "classic rock" stations. The air heads who run the Undiscovery channel just don't get it.

The viewers have a short attention span and an even shorter memory. That is what the creation of the synthetic world has accomplished. In the last few hundred years - a mere fraction of the time man has existed, man has lost the ability to operative and survive in his natural environment. Not only has man become disfunctional in the forest, he panics and cries when the power goes out merely for a few minutes while he sits within the confines of four walls.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more