Comic Cracks At Comedian's Cremation

Funny story written by Shaun Ferguson

Tuesday, 26 June 2007

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"It's the way I tell 'em"

Mourners at the funeral of Britain's favourite comedian Bernard Manning were brought to tears - by the non-stop banter of attention hungry guests.

B-list comics flocked to Manchester's Blackley Crematorium to share the limelight with the deceased funny-man, who's final parting has brought messages of sympathy from far right groups all over the world.

Fellow fat-man Frank Carson began the deluge of tired one-liners and was soon joined by Roy Walker, Stan Boardman, Roy "Chubby" Brown and Jim Bowen, all filling the air with blue jokes and racist gags.

Token black attendee Charlie Williams delivered an emotional eulogy denying Manning was a bigot and insisting that whenever they toured, "Bernard always let me sit at the front of the bus. I was driving it!".

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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