Written by Monkey Woods

Monday, 18 June 2007

image for Cambodian Dictator Wins 'Britain's Got Talent' TV Show
Paul Potts after the result was announced

A Cambodian dictator, thought to have died in 1998, has been declared the winner of the dreadful TV variety show Britain's Got Talent after his stirring rendition of the operatic favourite Nessun Dorma.

Paul Potts, who was the leader of the Khmer Rouge and the Prime Minister of Cambodia between 1976 and 1979, received a cheque for £100,000 and will now appear as part of the Royal Variety Performance.

"The whole country has gone Paul Potts potty", said show host Ant McPartlin.

Some two million viewers voted for Potts, which is almost exactly the number of intellectuals and other bourgois enemies he disposed of during his murderous reign of terror in the 1970s.

Potts, who now lives in Wales, is a fan of opera legend Luciano Pavarotti, but would have shot him in the head if he'd met him thirty years ago.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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