Haley Scarnato to Sue Blake Lewis Over American Idol Shorts Stitch-up

Funny story written by Estevez Bruin

Thursday, 19 April 2007

image for Haley Scarnato to Sue Blake Lewis Over American Idol Shorts Stitch-up
Haley's consolation prize

Hollywood, CA: Ousted American Idol contestant Haley Scarnato, who almost became famous for her ever-decreasing clothing as the show progressed, is to sue fellow contestant Blake Lewis for allegedly sabotaging her chances by deliberately mis-stitching her shorts.

Ms Scarnato, 24, is alleging that Blake Lewis, almost famous for making his own pants, offered to help her with her shrinking wardrobe by creating an extra-skimpy pair of satin shorts for the show's Latin themed night which eventually saw her eliminated.

In an statement issued by her lawyers, Ms Scarnato states: "When he heard that I was having trouble with my shorts, Blake offered to make a pair for me. As I'm a big fan of his pants, I immediately accepted, thinking he would do a wonderful job, but what I didn't realise was that he deliberately didn't use his normal Singer sewing machine, but made my shorts on a Karaoke instead."

Ms Scarnato's lawsuit alleges that as a result of Mr Lewis' underhanded stitch-up, her performance was below-par and led to her ejection from the show. The fact that judge Randy Jackson clearly stated that her performance was "just Karaoke for me, dawg" is cited as proof of the effect that Lewis' dastardly switch had on Ms Scarnato that night.

The lawsuit further alleges that Sanjaya Malakar, almost famous for his wacky hairdos, conspired with Lewis by advising Ms Scarnato to wear her hair in an unflattering style that evening, further contributing to her demise.

Neither Mr Lewis (who was too busy with his needle and thread), nor Mr Malakar (curling tongs) were available for comment last night. Simon Cowell was available for comment, as usual, but had nothing positive to say about anything so we declined to quote him.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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