Mexico City - (Ass Mess): Contestants in next months's Mexico City Miss Universe pageant have been told to rethink their national costumes after a spate of sartorial faux pas was deemed too damned accurate for the sponsors' liking.
The Gaza contestant's traditional abbaya with matching hidden suicide bomb belt received initial praise for its lifelike Hamas design.
However this was soon upstaged by Miss Mexico whose own 'war gown' has sparked the most outrage.
The dress depicts images of Roman Catholic rebels hanging from posts and a man facing a firing squad and represent scenes from the 1926-1929 Cristero War in which thousands died.
"But it was the rosaries and scapularies hanging from a bullet-studded belt, as well as the crucifix necklace and a very dodgy-looking sombrero that finally did it for us," said a pageant organiser.
Miss USA's dress also drew howls of opprobrium by featuring flag-draped soldiers coffins returning home from Iraq against a Halliburton Corporation HQ background.
The Miss UK dress was also a disaster: a pantheon of carefuly embroidered images of the House of Windsor had the unfortunate inclusion of Kate Middleton, the wannabe-princess who got dumped at the weekend by Pretender to the Throne's son William.
And the other son, Harry, depicted in his party outfit of a Nazi uniform, didn't go down too well with New York's Jewish sponsors on the pageant.
Miss Spain's outfit featuring torture characters from the Spanish Inquisition likewise bombed.
As did Miss Vatican's 'miracle' dress which was festooned with holograpic images of the late Pope JP2's hands oozing stigmata.
All contestants will now have to have their outfits approved before entering the pageant's podium or risk a compulsory redesign outfit being imposed on them by Wallmart sartorial advisors.
