Shyamali Malakar, Sister of Sanjaya, Posts Nude Photos Too

Funny story written by Throckmorton Turdblossom

Friday, 6 April 2007


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image for Shyamali Malakar, Sister of Sanjaya, Posts Nude Photos Too
A fuzzy picture from Shyamali's blog

First, Antonella Barba had nude pictures of herself posted on the internet that helped her survive on American Idol. Then, Alaina Alexander had nude pictures of her posted on the internet that have helped her boyfriend Chris stay in the top eight. Now, Shyamali Malakar, the sister of the infamous Sanjaya, has had naked photos of her posted on the internet to help her brother with the competition.

Shyamali was one of those invited to Hollywood. She managed to make it to the last cuts major cuts before the group of 24 was finally selected. Away from the show, she works as a Hooter's girl in Tacoma, Washington.

Shyamali said that she was "really proud of my brother and the progress he makes every week. He doesn't even make the bottom two or three anymore and is one of the most popular. I thought that if I offered to remove a little more clothing and show a little more skin for each week he survives, it might help him get more votes! Every week, you'll see a little more skin and the pictures will be in a little better focus."

Alaina did not take this lying down (or on her knees, her other favorite position). She said that she was "throwing down the gloves. My boyfriend is better than her brother and I've got a bigger and better rack than she does. We'll just see which tits America is going to vote for!"

Judge Simon Cowell was shocked at the challenge. "This is supposed to be a singing competition. It's becoming Stripping For The Stars! Both young ladies have nice looks, but I don't think it should help their champions get votes. It's bloody awful."

Host Ryan Seacrest, who deflected rumors this week that he was gay, had a different take. "I'm the guy who has to stand there every week and hug the contestants when they get a bad judging or get cut. I've managed to cop a feel of all three girls on more than one occasion and have a firm grip on the situation. I'm not going to say which one had the tightest ass or the best boobs, because I'm not the kind to kiss and tell, but....damn their all hot!"

Simon, of course, had the final word. "My, My, I hope Lakisha doesn't decide to wiggle that fat arse of hers on camera next. I just don't think the stage is wide enough. It would be ghastly."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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