Trump tried his hardest to lose, but MAGA people, Putin, and Musk wouldn't let him quit. Trumpeter wanted his television jig back. Playing a television boss was easy. White House work was work. Those midnight telephone calls interrupted his sleep. There goes a plate of pasta headed for a bedroom wall.
Before winning, Trump tried his hardest to lose by accusing Haitian foreigners of eating cats and dogs. Who would believe that BS? His voters would dismiss him as nuts and ready for retirement.
No way! His MAGA people believed the story.
He tried again with his half-hour dance routine, pumping the left fist, then the right fist, eyes closed, feet fixed to the floor, resembling a drunk, and praying, "MAGA people, look here, see me? I'm nuts. I don't belong in the White House."
Nope! His MAGA people loved Trump's dance routines.
Finally, Donald Trump play his last card: The Arnold Palmer Penis. A ten-year-old girl sitting in the audience behind Trump looked wide-eyed and confused. Her mother frozen. Trump spoke extensively about the view in the locker room when Palmer stepped out of the shower nude. Though Trump didn't precisely say Palmer was hung like a horse, it seemed some penis envy was involved.
It didn't matter. Putin and Musk shoe-horned Trump back into the White House. Putin declared the US a failed state, and Elon Musk will get billions to go to Mars.
Still fighting to stay out of the White House, Trump began announcing cabinet members straight out of the cast of One Flew Out Of The Cuckoo's Nest.
The White House walls? More pasta is coming.
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