Christopher Gay escaped from prison, stole a pick-up truck, hijacked a WalMart tractor-trailer commandeered Country Music Star Crystal Gayle's tour bus and infiltrated a NASCAR Champion's inner circle - all to see his dying mama!
When Gay was finally captured, the courtroom at his trial was packed with disgruntled complainants who wanted his hide. The prison guards who let Gay escape on their watch, while he was taking a crap, demanded that Gay be given a stiff sentence. The unemployed pick-up truck owner sought exorbitant compensation for the loss of his work vehicle.
WalMart's team of high-powered attorneys wanted Gay charged with interstate commerce violations,Gayle's representatives demanded repayment for her missed engagements at six roadside dives and NASCAR believes Gay should be tried as a terrorist.
Gay's court appointed lawyer, Won Smart Joo, gained permission to provide testimony from each of the complainant's mothers. Day after day the jury heard stories of neglect,abuse and downright crime committed by these upstanding citizens against their mamas. The most dramatic moment in the court proceedings occurred when Christopher's mama herself testified. The frail old woman debilitated by her terminal illness painfully made her way to the stand. Through belabored breath, Mama Anna managed to whisper: "What he done was wrong... gasp...but he knows his mama ain't got long...".
The courtroom was silent except for the audible sobs of judge,jury and gallery members. The Judge, after composing himself, stood to his full height and told the complainants that they should be ashamed of the way they have treated their mamas.
Casting a sober gaze upon Mr Gay,the magistrate intoned: "Christopher Gay, your mama is right. You have done wrong but as the good book says love covers a multitude of sins and so go home son, and take care of your mama".
The courtroom erupted in cheers as Gay lifted his tiny little mama from her chair ,marched out of the court and after a few maneuvers placed her in the passenger's seat of the Judge's new SUV, hot wired the sucker and drove his mama home.
