Dragons' Den New Boy Touker Suleyman Actually Backs Something

Funny story written by Nick Hobbs

Thursday, 13 August 2015

image for Dragons' Den New Boy Touker Suleyman Actually Backs Something
Theo Suleyman, yesternoon.

Dragons' Den new addition, Touker Suleyman, yesterday shocked viewers by actually liking an idea and parting with some cash.

The Dragons' newest addition was under suspicion of not actually having any money, due to his constant, scathing dismissal of every idea that was placed in front of him, in the infamous den.

The 40 year old star, who made his name as a Theo Paphitis look-alike, opening supermarkets and touring the club circuit in Tenerife, during his predecessors heyday, hadn't backed a single project until last night, when a pitch for bespoke made flip-flops garnered his attention.

Ashley and Blake Buckstop's boutique footwear struck a cord with the entrepreneur, who had often been forced to wear cumbersome sandals when cruising the beaches of the Canary Islands, between gigs.

'I like these flip-flops, and you know what?' he said, in his closest Theo accent, 'I like you'.

Praise indeed, but not content with that, Suleyman finished Theo's direct quote from series 3 by adding 'I could invest in you as much as your product'.

The boys received £25 for a 85% stake in their company, which was wound up before the lift ride down to Evan Davis.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot